


Jonathan Unruh (Rough Draft/Sketches)

by wowbright



Category: Glee
Genre: Coming Out, Coming of Age, Episode: s04e08 Thanksgiving, Episode: s04e09 Swan Song, Gen, M/M, Mennonite, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Religion, Rosedale Mennonites - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-06
Updated: 2013-12-01
Packaged: 2018-04-30 06:14:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 3,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5153294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wowbright/pseuds/wowbright
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A Glee WIP about a gay guy from the Mennonite group that competed against the New Directions at the 2012 Sectionals. In which Lima is some people’s Hell and other people’s Salvation. Told in annoyingly short segments as I have time. Sp-oilers through the first five minutes of “Swan Song”/4.09. Unbeta-ed; pointing out of typos welcome.</p><p>
  <strong>Update, 8/10/2016: THIS IS A ROUGH DRAFT. You can find the completed work (also called "Jonathan Unruh") here: <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/7723831/chapters/17603965">http://archiveofourown.org/works/7723831/chapters/17603965</a>.</strong>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Um, I may finally write a non-Klaine reaction fic. But don’t worry, it’s still gay.
> 
> If you’re wondering what Jonathan, Sarah, Edna and the Pfeiffers look like, here’s a [pictorial guide](http://the-multicorn.tumblr.com/post/38982684673/all-the-characters-from-wowbrights-rosedale) to the Rosedale Mennonites by the wondrous multicorn.
> 
> This chapter originally on tumblr [here](http://wowbright.tumblr.com/post/37340677696/um-i-may-finally-write-a-non-klaine-reaction-fic-but).

So I felt no need to write a reaction post to the Thanksgiving episode. But then last night I was lying in bed reading and crown-of-weeds, just by virtue of saying the word “Mennonites” – made my brain go off on this tangent and I started to think about that one guy in the second/back row (lets call him Jonathan Unruh) and how they drive by Scandals on their way out of Lima and he gets distracted from the rest of the kids in the van politely bickering about why they lost.*

(Jacob Friesen says it’s because they should have stuck with the four-part harmonies they’re used to and know their good at, and that they shouldn’t have used all those instruments because they’re so worldly; and Sarah Yoder says it’s because of that solo that Laura Dyck sang - “Laura has a beautiful voice, but all the other groups do solos, too, and what makes us different is that we know how to sing as a group, and make something beautiful from the whole, without drawing attention to any one person,” is what Sarah says, even though it’s clear she wants to say “Laura is vain” - and Alfred Stoltzfus says they should have sung in German because the judges seemed to be impressed by that one group singing in Korean; and then Edna Groening says they should stop bickering and pray for the girl who collapsed and send her a get-well gift or maybe even visit her in the hospital; but then they start bickering about what the get-well gift should be and how best to present the Gospel in deed not word …)

ANYWAY, Jonathan Unruh sees, as they’re passing by Scandals, two guys holding hands in the parking lot, and it’s  _not_  the way that little boys hold hands. For one, they’re not little boys, and for another, he sees the way they’re looking at each other, and for yet another, Jonathan Unruh used to wish to hold hands with Seth Groening that way before Seth moved to Manitoba and Jonathan let that hole in his heart close up.

So Jonathan stays silent during the bickering and plans. Because he is going to come back to Lima, and he is going to get into Scandals because obviously it is  _that_  kind of bar, and he is finally going to find people who are like him, even if they’re not like him at all.

And then … well, I’m really supposed to be working right now, so I’ll have to stop there, but the two people in all of Glee fandom who give one whit about Mennonites I’m sure will be clamoring for what happens next.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Originally on [tumblr.](http://wowbright.tumblr.com/post/37407805230/that-kind-of-wip-about-the-gay-guy-from-the)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still have a ton of work to do, but until I’m done with my morning coffee, I think I’ll continue working on that outline of That Fic About the Gay Guy from the Mennonite Group at Sectionals.
> 
> (Of course, outline may be the only form that this fic ever sees, because I have all these intense, well-researched Klaine fics that I’ve been working on and are begging to see the light of day, and so this might just be my fun brainstormy thing that I jot down here and there and that is of fluctuating quality because I am writing the whole thing in Tumblr windows and not some word processing doc.)
> 
> I guess I’ll be tagging it “Glee Mennoverse” until something better presents itself.

The story starts [here](http://wowbright.tumblr.com/post/37340677696/um-i-may-finally-write-a-non-klaine-reaction-fic-but).

And it continues here, with Jonathan Unruh staring out the window and planning his next trip to Lima, and his first trip to Scandals, and the rest of the kids in the van discussing get-well gifts for the girl from McKinley who fainted during sectionals.

Jonathan finally pipes in. “Why don’t we just all go home and bake her something –” A couple of the boys look at him askance. “Or ask our moms or sisters to bake her something, and I’ll deliver everything to Lima on Saturday.”

Edna Groening bounces in her seat. “That’s a wonderful idea. She’s so skinny. She could really use it.”

Sarah Yoder glares at her. “Way to judge someone on her appearance, Edna.”

Of course, the next thing that happens is that everyone starts volunteering to make the trip to Lima with Jonathan because they’re Mennonites and they always want to do everything in a group because they take the “community” in “community of Christ” very, very seriously.

But Jonathan says he’ll probably have to take the pick-up (because contrary to popular belief, Mennonites aren’t Amish and most of them are allowed to drive unless, you know, they have stack of DUIs or no driver’s license), and there’s only one passenger seat in it, and that will be taken up by the food, obviously, and anyway the idea was to give her some get-well gifts, not to overwhelm her with a large group of pushy Mennonites.

“Wait,” says Alfred Stolzfus. “Do you have a crush on her? Is that why you don’t want any of us to come with you?”

And Jonathan rolls his eyes and says no, he does not have a crush on her, if God is willing, he’d like to have at least seven children someday and it’s obvious the girl’s body couldn’t handle that.

Sarah’s jaw drops open at that and once she regains her powers of speech, she says, “Jonathan, don’t talk about girls that way. She’s not one of the pigs in your barn.”

He smirks at her and says, “Clearly. If she was one of the pigs in my barn, she’d be much better fed.” He doesn’t  _actually_  think of girls the way he thinks of the pigs in his barn, but it’s best to give the impression that he does. It keeps any of the girls he knows from wanting him to court them.

Sarah pretends he’s invisible for the rest of the ride home. She and Edna get on their cellphones (yup, Mennonites can have cellphones) and log into Facebook (their parents might not be fond of it, but what parent is?) and look up the New Directions Facebook page and start sending friend requests to all the members so they can ask what foods the girl - Marley, her name turns out to be - likes best, and so they can find out where Jonathan should deliver it all on Saturday. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And my coffee is done, so I guess I’ll have to pick this up later …


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally on [tumblr.](http://wowbright.tumblr.com/post/38634810285/wip-jonathan-unruh-part-3)

Jonathan can’t sleep when he gets home.

He keeps thinking about those two men outside of the gay bar - Scandals, he reminds himself (he ripped his eyes away from the men long enough to catch the name so he could find it again). They become clearer to him every time he closes his eyes, closer to him than the 10 or so yards that separated them when he was inside the van. Jonathan can see the fine lines around their eyes when they smile, and a certain softness in their pupils when they look at each other, and the way their fingers curl tighter - with pleasure and excitement and something like praise - when they look at each other’s faces.

Last week, when Jonathan saw the sandhill cranes high in the sky overhead, and their strange calls filled his head like something ancient and everlasting, and the tips of their wings seemed to touch the clouds, he set down the buckets he was bringing back to the barn and forgot everything for a moment. And he felt something - it must have been God’s love - swell in his heart and he wanted to fly up there with them, to praise the sky and the air and everything that God has created, and he lost himself in that longing until they were gone, far past the treeline, and their odd ancient call was drowned by the sound of the tractor motor spitting to life.

The feeling that he felt comes back into his heart when he remembers the two men - and if it was God’s love when he watched the sandhill cranes, could it be God’s love now?

Jonathan reaches for his phone. In the bunk above him, his younger brother Mark snores.

He googles Scandals and saves the address is his notes. He revisits the daily Bible reading page on GayChristian.Net and reads the discussion forum for a while. Then he goes to the New Directions Facebook page and starts friending its members.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And here is Part 4, in which Jonathan makes a new friend. A little longer than Part 3. Feel free to message me if I have annoying typos, or for any other reason. Thanks!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally on [tumblr.](http://wowbright.tumblr.com/post/38661474306/wip-jonathan-unruh-part-4)

Jonathan’s been given leave to sleep in on Friday because of Sectionals the night before, but he automatically wakes up at 5 a.m., anyway. He keeps his eyes closed as Mark climbs out of the bunk and shuffles back and forth between the closet and dresser. He can hear the other kids stirring in their rooms, and little Marilou is singing to herself as she walks down the stairs to join their mother in the kitchen. You’re not supposed to have a favorite among your family members, but Marilou is Jonathan’s, and if he were out of bed he would hold her hand as they went down the stairs together, and when he dropped her off at the kitchen before heading out to the barn, he would kiss the little ragdoll she carries with her everywhere goodbye, at Marilou’s insistence.

But not today. Jonathan pretends to be asleep until Mark clomps down the stairs and shuts the front door behind him. He never gets this room to himself, and it’s a sweet, indulgent pleasure just to lie here and do nothing and answer to no one.

Jonathan grabs his phone. Maybe he’ll read the daily Bible passage on GayChristian.net or play Mahjong until he’s tired enough to fall back asleep. But as soon as he turns it on, he sees he has a notification from Facebook, so he goes there.

One of the kids from New Directions has already accepted his friend request, and Jonathan feels his heart do a little leap, and he’s never going to be able to get back to sleep now, because it’s the beautiful boy with skin the color of warm milk sweetened with sorghum molasses, the one he kept watching when New Directions was on stage, watched as he danced the way that Mennonites aren’t supposed to want to dance, free of self-consciousness and inhibition.

Jake Puckerman has not only accepted the friend request, but he’s sent a message, too.

> So you’re the third friend request I’ve gotten from one of the Mennonites tonight. I thought the first one was a joke because you guys don’t use computers and aren’t allowed to take pictures of yourselves, and then the second one came, and then there’s this one from you, so then I googled Mennonites and found out they were different from Amish and I felt kind of ignorant. People make all kinds of assumptions about me, too. I like our President, but I get tired of people calling me Barack Obama. Which I guess is my way of saying I feel stupid for stereotyping.
> 
> Tell me more about your non-Amish life.

Jonathan smiles so big his cheeks hurt, and he feels himself blushing, even though he really knows he can’t hope that Jake is … that way. It’s still nice to have someone beautiful be nice to you, and to be able to gaze at all those pictures of them in their Facebook photo album, and Jonathan doesn’t frown when he sees that Jake is “in a relationship with Marley Rose,” because of course Jake would have a girlfriend, because Jake is stunning, and maybe since Jake’s girlfriend is the girl who fainted …

Jonathan bites his bottom lip and pictures Jake answering the door tomorrow when Jonathan arrives at Marley’s house with the food. Jake inviting him in, and the three of them sitting at the kitchen table and playing rook and the color returning to Marley’s cheeks as she eats plate after plate of shoofly pie and pumpkin bread and apple slump. And after they were done, Jake would offer to show Jonathan Lima, and Jonathan wouldn’t go to Scandals at all, because he’d be with Jake, and maybe they’d go to the batting cages or to a basketball game if the school had one, or maybe they’d just sit on the river and talk about things they don’t talk about with anyone else.

Jonathan bites his bottom lip again to keep himself from getting too carried away. He got too carried with Seth Groening, and then Seth got married and moved to Manitoba.

It’s hard, though. In these first moments of falling, Jonathan always feels so alive.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And here is Part 5, in which Jonathan’s daily Bible reading is from the Song of Solomon (hubba hubba):

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally on [tumblr.](http://wowbright.tumblr.com/post/38696064171/wip-jonathan-unruh-part-5)

Jonathan isn’t sure what to say in his answer to Jake. He summarizes his “non-Amish life” with

> I am the third of eight children. I’m not technically a Mennonite because I’m not baptized yet. We don’t get baptized and join the church until we’re adults. My family has a van and a truck and a couple of “project cars” that don’t work very well but that my brothers and I keep trying to get to run better. We don’t have a horse and buggy and that’s not how our group got to sectionals, either. I’m not sure where the emcee got that idea. OK, well, I guess I know where he got that idea, but it wasn’t from us.
> 
> Anyway, I hope your girlfriend is feeling better. We have some get-well gifts for her and I could drop them off tomorrow, do you think that would be okay?

He knows he’s not going to get an answer soon - city kids don’t wake up at 5 a.m. ever, much less on long weekends (and anyway he cheats and checks to see if Jake is online, and he’s not) - so Jonathan switches out of Facebook and clicks on his Bible, which is bookmarked to today’s reading, and hopes it will keep his mind off of Jake’s beautiful brown eyes.

It doesn’t work out, because it’s the first two chapters of Song of Solomon today, which is … distracting. It starts with “Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth— for your love is more delightful than wine,” and he hasn’t technically even met the guy yet and he’s already thinking about what Jake’s lips would feel like.

And to continue the torture, the book goes on with “Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes;your name is like perfume poured out,” and Jonathan remembers how Seth used to smell - like skin and grass and Dial and, sometimes, when they’d been outside a long time, something headier and sharper but not any less pleasing, and Jonathan wonders if that’s what Jake smells like, or if guys who live in the city smell different up close - more perfumed and less like soap and sweat. And then he blinks his eyes and tries to clear his mind, but the words won’t let him; they just keep barraging him with more and more desire, with images of “verdant beds” and a beloved like a cluster of henna blossoms (and Jonathan has never seen henna blossoms, but he’s seen witchhazel bloom in winter when everything else seems dead, and that’s how it’s going to be when he falls in love with someone who can love him back).

Jonathan gives up. He closes his Bible app and locks his phone and gets out of bed. From the sounds below in the kitchen, breakfast is only partway through. He can go downstairs and get some bacon while it’s still a little warm and drink half a pot of coffee and draw smiley faces with syrup on his pancakes to amuse Marilou.

It’s a hassle, sometimes, to have a large family. When you want to be alone with your thoughts, you hardly ever can.

But when you don’t want to be alone with your thoughts, there’s always someone around to distract you.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally on [tumblr.](http://wowbright.tumblr.com/post/68284310311/wip-jonathan-unruh-part-6)

Later that afternoon, when his mother and sisters are making supper and Mark is outside raking leaves for the compost pile, Jonathan goes up to his room to change for his shift at the 7-11. Once he’s in his work uniform, he listens to make sure that no one’s come up the stairs, then pulls out a shoe box from under the bed.

It’s a bunch of mementos his older brother Alvin left behind when he abandoned them for that Amish community two counties over. The week before his baptism, Alvin threw away his driver’s license, his his battery-powered radio, and (for reasons that Jonathan still can’t fathom) the set of Rook cards that he used to carry around constantly in his front pocket. Jonathan fished them all out of the trashcan as soon as Alvin left, and put them in this shoebox. He’d already used it to hide Alvin’s childhood photos, afraid that Alvin would throw those away too if he’d found them.

Jonathan looks a lot like his older brother. Alvin is skinny as a rail, with dark eyebrows and large white teeth and high cheekbones that would make the models in 7-11 magazine display jealous. It’s not a look that Jonathan find particularly attractive, but that makes sense since it’s practically like looking at his own face.

Alvin’s 22 now, and his driver’s license doesn’t expire for another three years. Jonathan takes it out of the box and sticks it in his wallet.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for body image issues in this segment.
> 
> Originally on [tumblr](http://wowbright.tumblr.com/post/68369687001/wip-jonathan-unruh-part-7).

Saturday finally dawns. Jonathan has traded a few more messages with Jake, and a couple with Marley, too; they’ll be hanging out at her house today, and sure he can stop by if he likes, maybe they can teach each other some new songs.

Sarah’s the first one to come by in the morning. She brings chocolate chip cookies, a loaf of whole wheat bread, a jar of cherry jam, a roll of apple leather and some deer jerky. “What’s she going to do with all this food?” Jonathan says as Sarah sets her box of provisions on the kitchen table next to the two pies that Jonathan’s sisters already baked for Marley this morning – one apple and one pumpkin, because Jonathan couldn’t tell them if Marley had a preference. “You’re the first person who’s come over today and we already have enough to feed her entire glee club.”

Sarah rolls her eyes at him as she sits down without being invited. (She doesn’t need to be invited; she’s been over at this house so much since they were toddlers that she’s as much a part of it as the furniture.) “It was your idea to do the care package. And if she wants to share it with her show choir, it’s none of my business.” She looks down at her hands sheepishly. “Besides, Edna was right. That girl is pretty skinny.”

“Well, Miss ‘Don’t judge someone on their appearances’ has certainly had a change of heart,” Jonathan teases as she settles into the chair next to her. He has an urge to reach across the corner of the table and pinch Sarah the way he did when they were younger, but they’re too old for that now. She might misinterpret it. So he doesn’t.

“Well, I still think Edna should keep her mouth shut about the way that other girls look. Not everyone is as naturally … ample as she is.” The smallest bit of color fills Sarah’s cheeks.

“Do you need to confess the sin of vanity, Miss Yoder?”

Sarah kicks him under the table.

“And violence, too! Why Sarah Jane, I never realized what a worldly girl you are. A lot of things you’re going to need to renounce before your baptism.”

Sarah’s chair screeches against the floor as she scoots back from the table. “Where are your sisters, anyway?”

“They went to the neighbors to drop off a pie. They should be back in a few minutes if you want to hang around.”

Sarah shakes her head. “No, I’ll go find them.” At the back door, she turns to give him a warning look. “Don’t let Mark eat any of that food. And don’t you eat it, either.”

Jonathan looks down at his gangly frame, pats his concave stomach. As soon as puberty hit, all his baby fat turned into sinew; adolescence has been a constant battle to keep on weight. His mother says he’ll eventually grow into his frame, but his father’s like a pencil, and so was Alvin the last time he saw him – so Jonathan’s not convinced. “You don’t think I could afford to fatten up like Marley Rose?”

Sarah rolls her eyes again. “You’re not fainting on stage. You’re fine.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally on [tumblr.](http://wowbright.tumblr.com/post/68737742267/wip-jonathan-unruh-part-8)

The kitchen is a whirlwind all morning once Sarah and Jonathan’s sisters get back to help his mother with the rest of the week’s baking, and with visitor upon visitor coming by with food for Marley. Jonathan keeps his distance from the chaos as much as possible, chopping wood out by the barn and hauling it over to the woodpile every time he’s got an armful.

It’s on one of these trips that he notices the older of the Groenings’ two minivans in the driveway, and he’s been concentrating so hard on his work and forgetting the world around him that he thinks for a moment that it must be Seth come to visit. His palms start to sweat in his work gloves and his heart jumps into his throat and he’s about to drop the logs that are in his arms and run toward the car like an idiot when Edna from glee club steps out of the driver’s side.

_Of course you dolt, Edna’s his sister. You’ve only known that for the past 16 years._

He shakes his head at himself and the foolishness of his body.

The Pfeiffer sisters get out of the car, too, and one of them points in his direction and then the other two girls turn and wave. He calls out a hello and wishes the pile of logs in his arms when high enough to cover his red face.

By noon, everyone has dropped off their contributions to Marley’s care package. It comes to 5 grocery bags worth, which strikes Jonathan as awfully excessive for a people who pride themselves on moderation. He really should have through this through a little more carefully when he made this plan.

There’s  fresh pretzels from the Wiebes, a peck of black twig and russet apples from the Stoltzfus orchard, cranberry cake, macaroni and cheese, turnip casserole, jello salad, roll kuchen, whoopie pies, the Pfeiffers’ famous sauerkraut, more kinds of bread than Jonathan wants to count, and jars and jars of homemade jam. Harry Thiesen was an idiot and brought a jar of his mom’s pickled eggs and beets – which is one of Jonathan’s favorite snacks, to be sure, but even Harry must know that normal people don’t eat like that. And Laura Dyck – poor Laura Dyck.

The food she brought is fine: sugar cookies and gingersnaps. It’s the non-food item that makes Jonathan shake his head: A CD of recordings from their glee club’s dress rehearsals, most of which she solos on. Jonathan had protested when she brought the microphone and computer into their rehearsals, but Laura had insisted: “It’s not vain. Christ said not to hide our light under a bushel.”

“He was talking about the gospel, Laura.  _We’re_ not the light,” Jonathan had shot back. Laura was so frustrating sometimes. Her dad was a real Mennonite, but her mom was a convert and the kids clearly weren’t being raised as well as they should; the whole family stood out like odd ducks half the time.

“Our songs preach the gospel,” was Laura’s answer, and none of the other members of the group wanted to get into a fight. So the argument ended and Laura got her way.

Jonathan’s always found it easy to bicker ad nauseum over things he doesn’t really care about. Having lots of brothers and sisters has given him plenty of practice at that. But the things closer to his heart – he has no idea how to fight for them once he meets resistance.


	9. Chapter 9

I won't be updating this work at this location because, in the revisions, I changed so much that it wouldn't have worked to simply tack on chapters.

You can find the completed work (also called "Jonathan Unruh") here: <http://archiveofourown.org/works/7723831/chapters/17603965>.


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